


Intervention

by ohmyfae



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Awkward Sex, M/M, OT4 if you squint - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-17
Updated: 2016-12-17
Packaged: 2018-09-09 05:50:03
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,593
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8878402
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ohmyfae/pseuds/ohmyfae
Summary: Prompto and Noctis aren't talking to each other. Ignis and Gladio decide to intervene, with mixed results.





	

**Author's Note:**

> My wife insisted I post this! I have been waffling on throwing it out there for a solid week.

Ignis was the first to notice that there was something wrong with Prompto and Noctis. Noct was remarkably late for breakfast, even for his typical schedule, and appeared just as Prompto was putting away his plates. The two men looked at each other. Prompto flushed. Noct made a strangled sound in the back of his throat. 

“Ahugh hnn,” Prompto said, intelligibly. Noct’s face twisted in a rictus of panic. The blonde looked from Noct to Ignis, took a step back, and made a beeline for the convenience store.

“Good morning, Ignis.” Noct said, into the deadened silence. 

“….Morning.” Ignis watched Noct pile his plate with bacon and retreat to the corner of the motel deck, where he huddled in the shade like a disgraced cat. 

A warmth at his back warned Ignis of Gladio’s presence. He turned just as Gladio was reaching out to tap his shoulder. “Iggy. You know why Prompto’s hyperventilating in the hardware section?”

Ignis shrugged. “If I had to guess, I’d say for the same reason that Noct is shoving five pieces of bacon in his mouth at once.”

Gladio looked over at the prince, who did indeed look like he was trying to court death by way of breakfast-related suffocation. “Huh. Lover’s spat?”

“I’m not so sure.” Noct and Prompto had fought before. Their disagreements usually ended with one or the other dragging them both out into the dark at night to apologize, which meant Gladio or Ignis had to get up and drag them back before they were devoured by wolves. This didn’t feel like that sort of situation. “You talk to Noctis, and I’ll talk to Prompto. We need to have a united front if we are going to make it out of Lucis in one piece."

“Of course,” Gladio said. “Not that you _care_ about them.”

“How well you know me.”

 

Ignis found Prompto with his back to a display of power tools, staring at the ceiling. He jumped when Ignis approached him.

“Hey! What--What are you doing here, Ignis?”

Ignis saw this going in two possible directions. One, he could placate Prompto by playing along with the small talk, getting them nowhere. Two, he could drag Prompto to the back of the store and ask him directly, embarrassing them both. 

Ah, well.

Prompto squeaked as Ignis grabbed a fistful of his vest, twisted for a good handhold, and walked his sorry ass out of the store.

“Now,” Ignis said, when they had placed some distance between them and any curious hangers-on. “What happened?”

“Nothing!” Prompto said. His voice was just a little too high. “Everything’s great! We are not having this conversation.”

“Unfortunately, we are.” Ignis pressed a hand on Prompto’s shoulder, and pushed him down until he was sitting on the curb. The blonde’s blush had crept, rash-like, down his neck and shoulders, making him look like he’d been doused in scalding water. “Prompto. Did something… happen… between you and Noct?”

Prompto’s face was a study in horror.

“No-o.”

“Try again,” said Ignis. 

Prompto looked at him piteously, and was met with a will of steel. His shoulders sank. “Noct and I were… you know. In the hotel room.” He searched Ignis’ face, which had yet to change expression. “On the bed.”

It took a moment for this to register. “This is about sex,” he said, dully. 

“Yes.”

“You had sex on the hotel bed,” Ignis said. “This hotel. Which bed?” Please let it not be mine, he thought. Everyone knows hotels rarely wash the top sheets.

“Does that matter? Look, it just. Things got… How do I explain…”

 

\--

 

“I didn’t know what to do!” Noct said, through a mouthful of bacon. “One minute we were fine, and the next I was... He was there, and I was right there, I mean right there, but then he got confused, and I got confused, and then I shoved my hand in his face, and his knee got my ribs, and someone had to do something so I just… warped to the coffee machine.”

Gladio sat there for a long moment.

“Don’t you need a blade for that?” Gladio asked. There was a pause. “I’m going to regret asking this, but did you unequip your blades before you made it to the bed?”

There was a longer, heavier silence. Gladio reached over and clasped Noct’s head in both of his hands.

“Noct. You know I respect you.”

“Ha.”

“Shut up. You know I’ll follow you anywhere. You know I take my role as the heir to the Amicitia fucking personally. But you are being, and I want you to say this with me, a dumbass.”

“The hell?”

“That’s not what I want to hear you say,” Gladio said, in a low rumble.

Noct sighed. “I am a dumbass.” 

“It’s right to stop if you get confused during sex, but you are not—look at me, Noctis—You are not going to throw knives in _bed_ to avoid talking it out.”

Noct nodded.

“You are going to find Prompto and talk this over.” There was a silence. “Like the full grown adult you are.”

“Right,” Noct said. “Can you let go of me?”

Gladio released him. “You know, I thought your dad would’ve talked to you about this sort of thing. I can pull up some how-to guides on my phone if you’re struggling with anything, but—“

Noct held up his hands in defeat. “I’m going, I’m going!”

 

\--

 

Ignis and Prompto sat in silence behind the convenience store. Through the wall, they could hear a tinny jingle worming its way through the sweltering air of the Hammerhead parking lot. In front of them, a dust storm whirled in the sagebrush near the imperial blockade.

Prompto coughed.

“It sounds like you need a little help with the mechanics,” Ignis said, at last.

“I’m good at machines,” Prompto said, in a flat voice.

“That’s…. that’s good,” Ignis said. Oh gods, the panic was catching. “I’m not talking about that kind of mechanics.”

Prompto’s blush was such a deep red at this point that it was obscuring his freckles. Ignis had to admit he was impressed with the sheer force of their collective embarrassment.

“I’ve read books, you know,” Prompto said at last. “I’m not clueless.”

“Oh, good.” 

“We just… never went that far before.”

“Right.”

“I mean, we’ve made out plenty of times. Basically everywhere. Back home, in his apartment, at my place, in the tent, in the Regalia—“

Ignis barely stopped himself from making a squawk of outrage. The Regalia? Where in the Regalia? The seats were _leather_!

“And I’m pretty good at kissing,” Prompto continued. “So is Noct. And he's really good when it comes to, you know." He made a gesture, and Ignis blinked slowly.

"You mean to say," he said, "that the prince of Lucis has been giving you h--"

"He does this thing with his tongue, right," Prompto said, as though Ignis were not about to spontaneously combust right in front of him, "where he—“

“I think,” Ignis said, “that I don’t want to know what the crown prince can do with his tongue.” Which was only half a lie. Sure, he was… curious… but hearing it second-hand from Prompto in the back lot of Hammerhead was not a situation Ignis thought would occur in his lifetime.

“I guess it isn’t a big deal for you,” Prompto said. “You’ve been with lots of people.”

Ignis resisted the urge to slam his head against the wall. “Three, actually. Three is not ‘lots.’ I’m hardly an expert.”

Prompto thought about this. “What about Gladio?”

“How would I know about Gladio?” Ignis said. “I’m not sleeping with Gladio.”

Prompto’s worried frown disappeared. “Wasn’t what I was asking, buddy, but I’ll bite. Are you?”

Ignis made a noise that was definitely _not_ akin to an uncivilized sputtering.

Prompto laughed, easing himself to his feet. “Whatever you say, Specs.” The look he cast Ignis was far, far too knowing. Ignis kept a bland smile on his face until Prompto left him, upon which he took off his glasses, slumped against the stone wall of the store, and prayed for the ground to swallow him whole.

 

\--

 

Noct met Prompto at the door of the hotel room. In the parking lot, Gladio and Ignis were sitting in the Regalia, talking in low, furtive voices. Ignis looked particularly agitated—Gladio kept reaching over and rubbing his back in sympathy.

“Those two sure like to meddle,” said Prompto, at last.

“Tell me about it.” 

They watched the drama go on for another moment before Noct turned to Prompto, arms crossed.

“So,” he said. “We cool?”

“Yeah, bro.”

“We’ll just… take it slower next time.”

Prompto grinned. “And no warping.”

“No warping. I promise.”

They bumped fists and made their way to the car. Prompto clambered over the passenger door rather than open it, and Noct settled himself on the top of the backseat as though that were any way for a nobly-born man to behave. Ignis and Gladio peered at them suspiciously.

“Come on, dude,” Prompto said, hitting Ignis on the shoulder. “Let’s go.”

“You two work things out?” Gladio asked. Prompto made a show of rolling his eyes.

“Work out what?” Noct asked.

“Yeah,” said Prompto. “No big deal.”

“You guys,” Noct said, slipping down to lean his arms on Ignis’ headrest, “take things way too seriously.”

He was rewarded with creative cursing from Ignis and a slap on the back of the head from Gladio, but the looks of indignation on his friends’ faces were very, very worth it.


End file.
